Tag Archive for Reality

Yeah, so

You beat the crap out of a girl — like she asked, mind you — and don’t you know the next thing she’s gonna want is for you to hold her while she cries.

Go figure.


July Mark and I are taking a trip. As part of it, we’re seeing some old friends of ours. It happens that these particular old friends have been through roughly the same situation as Mark and I have struggled with this year. From what I gather, the girl is sexually open and the guy, less so.

Mark ran into the guy over the weekend and they had time to talk. Mark came home wanting to have “the difficult conversations,” whatever that means. As if we haven’t been having difficult conversations for the past 18 months now. He wanted to talk about our plans for July, which may or may not include going to a sex party.

First I refused. I told him that I don’t want to go to a sex party if all I can do is look but not touch and if I constantly have to defer to him about what I can do. It’s the truth. I can look but not touch from home.

Still, I’ve given it some thought. I’ve tried to turn the situation around for the better. So, I say, guys, you have two girls here who are saying they are willing to do pretty much anything. (At least I am. I hesitate to speak for my friend, so if you are her, please chime in yourself.)

This is an opportunity. I say, guys, make some plans. Don’t wait until July 1st, start now. You’re in charge. You make up the rules.┬áSet the agenda. Forget everything you’ve ever learned about being good Jewish boys and let’s have some fun.

On ice

I passed a super hot mom in heels walking across the icy field to pick up her kindergartener.

I should have offered a hand and said, “Can I help you across?”

I could have said, “At least on the way back, you’ll have a kid to hold onto!”

I actually said nothing (but smiled).

I’m pretty sure she thought I was laughing at her.

Why is this so fucking hard?

Come with me

Let’s run to the beach under the mottled sky. The sun will sting our eyes as we fall in line, settle our steps. Water lies gray as the asphalt and so still we can see the buoys like stones on the surface. We’ll pass the boats with sails down, transformed into skeletons, and the sand beyond empty. Should we stop?